So, the first Scratch showing of my new emerging piece “Dead Man I’m Dancing” is done. With it came that familiar mix of euphoria and doubt. It’s like finding an old glove, not one that I have worn for a long while really but all the same comfortable in it’s fear and stress and exhaltation and joy and relief!
The scratch night at the most glorious of theatres’ (Pegasus Theatre Oxford) was a great affair. I was terrified of being put in a room of PROPER dancers, feeling as though my faults would be highlighted. But my work is different, strong in other ways and the dancers were not at all intimidating – only supportive and gorgeous. It was like bringing an old version of myself back into the open. The light was bright and scary but the surroundings were comforting.
I’m returning to freelance performing and directing having stopped teaching in institutions. a job which had stolen my soul somewhat over the past 20 years. I’m letting my children see Mum when she is distracted by writing plays, creating dances, working out how on earth pigs actually TECHNICALLY move and hoping with all my heart that they, and my ever enduring clown prefer what they see.